Fuck Turkey

While Thanksgiving is now finished on both sides of the border, the spectre of Christmas dinner is looming on the horizon. What I love about Kristin Iversen’s Fuck Turkey is everything: tone, wit, anger, and relentless usage of everyone’s favourite four-letter word:

Turkey is not a good-tasting bird. Fuck turkey for not even tasting as good as fucking bland-ass chicken, which is a pretty low bar to begin with. Fuck turkey for not tasting anywhere near as good as duck, with its tender as hell breast meat which stays succulent thanks to being able to baste in its own delicious fat. And I’m not even going to talk about how good duck leg confit is because then I’ll just start getting mad at how mediocre the turkey leg confit was that I made one Thanksgiving in a last ditch effort to redeem it by making turkey finally taste ok and then after all that time prepping and cooking, guess what that turkey tasted like: just ok.

As someone who’s tried a few of the experiments below to middling results, I found myself nodding and chortling:

Fuck brining. Fuck a wet brine. Fuck a dry brine. Fuck a brown paper bag. Fuck butter under the skin. Fuck “turketta.” Fuck deep-frying. Fuck sous-vide. Fuck sous-vide before deep-frying, because how much fucking time do you have to spend to make something that doesn’t taste good, taste ok? Too much fucking time, that’s how much.

She forgot spatchcocking, which was fine when we tried it last year.

Thanksgiving in Halifax

Tomorrow afternoon, I leave St. Stephen to pick up my mom from the Moncton airport. She’s flying in to see Jaclyn and I for the Thanksgiving weekend and I’m definitely looking forward to seeing her. It’s been since before we went to Europe back in mid-May. Time flies…

We’re going to stop in Moncton long enough to pick her up and then spend the weekend in the lovely city of Halifax, since she’s already seen St. Stephen and all that it has to offer. Seriously, it’s got a lot going for it as a place to live, but it’s pretty useless as a place to visit.

Anyways, my blog will be silent over the weekend due to me being gone, as opposed to my blog being silent because I’m busy and/or lazy. (Speaking of not posting, I will be updating our sorely neglected Europe blog with some France pictures soon….)